Renee Hugger, AFC (Accredited Financial Counselor) Blog Page

Being a single mom alone can feel overwhelming, but when you add a controlling or manipulative person into the mix, it can feel downright suffocating. Regardless of how much you care about this person, his or her toxic behavior is not something that you should tolerate, especially through text messages. Here’s my approach to how I respond to text messages from controlling or manipulative people in a way that sets boundaries, preserves your dignity, and keeps you sane.

Let’s Get Real!

First, it’s important to remember that you are not responsible for anyone else’s behavior or feelings. Texts from controlling or manipulative people can be filled with accusations, chaos and attempts to make you feel guilty, but that doesn’t mean they’re right. If someone’s behavior is triggering negative feelings in you, take a step back and reassess the situation. It’s okay to take a break from this person or end a relationship if it’s not healthy for you.

How to Respond

Next, respond to the text message in a way that is assertive, respectful, and clear. Avoid being defensive or blaming yourself. Use “I” statements to express your point. Avoid “you” statements because they are accusatory. For example, you could say, “I need us to talk about things calmly and respectfully.” Remember that you have a right to your thoughts, feelings, and boundaries.

What if They Continue?

If the person continues to send you messages that are controlling or manipulative, it’s okay to set a boundary and not engage with the person. This could mean not answering their texts or even blocking their number. Sometimes, this is the best option if the person is not willing to listen to your boundaries. It is your right as a human being to prioritize your mental health and well-being.

You’re Not Alone

Consider seeking support from a trusted friend, family member, or therapist. It’s not easy to deal with controlling or manipulative people, and having someone to talk to can make all the difference. A therapist can also help you develop strategies to cope with the person’s behavior and set boundaries. I am not a Dr. or Therapist, what I do have is life experience with controlling and manipulative people! Join my private Facebook group to get support, start healing and even thrive financially!

Prioritize Self-Care

Finally, take care of yourself. Responding to text messages from a controlling or manipulative person can be emotionally draining and stressful. Make sure you’re practicing self-care by getting enough rest, eating healthy, exercising, and doing things that make you happy. Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and surround yourself with people who value you for who you are. Get my quick tips on how to deal with controlling or manipulative text messages.

One Last Thing…

Dealing with a controlling or manipulative person can be challenging, especially through text messages. However, by setting boundaries, expressing yourself assertively, and prioritizing your well-being, you can protect yourself from the person’s behavior and preserve your sanity. Remember that you’re not alone in this and that you are worthy of respect and love. With time, you will learn to recognize toxic behavior and create healthy relationships in your life. Don’t miss out on my recent post: Understanding trauma and recovery: Healing Your emotional Scars.

💜Renee

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